[Kratos' breath catches again, and his next words come out softly distant, as if trying to keep his emotions at bay.]
There was a rebellion in the ranch. I took her away then, before Kvar could retaliate. She was furious, at first; the first time I'd ever seen her furious. She couldn't understand why I didn't help.
[He hadn't had the words to explain why, even to himself, let alone to her.]
But later ... she seemed to understand better than I did. She had a way of that -- seeing, considering, figuring things out. That's how we got to where we did. She saw me, a human, tolerated if not respected by the half-elves of the ranch, and noticed that I never participated in the cruelty. She decided I was her best chance to help the people of the ranch.
[He laughs quietly and it hurts, in more ways than one; but he manages not to break into a coughing fit.]
She actually came up to me to demand more books for her students. She said it was in our best interests. After all, what causes more suffering than to offer hope and pull it away at a later date ... That was her argument, to convince one of her oppressors to alleviate their pain even a little.
[His words trail off into something raw. He hadn't had a counter-argument at the time. At the time, he hadn't had any hope to see. He couldn't imagine anything more painful than to have it and lose it. He'd been through that already.
no subject
[Kratos' breath catches again, and his next words come out softly distant, as if trying to keep his emotions at bay.]
There was a rebellion in the ranch. I took her away then, before Kvar could retaliate. She was furious, at first; the first time I'd ever seen her furious. She couldn't understand why I didn't help.
[He hadn't had the words to explain why, even to himself, let alone to her.]
But later ... she seemed to understand better than I did. She had a way of that -- seeing, considering, figuring things out. That's how we got to where we did. She saw me, a human, tolerated if not respected by the half-elves of the ranch, and noticed that I never participated in the cruelty. She decided I was her best chance to help the people of the ranch.
[He laughs quietly and it hurts, in more ways than one; but he manages not to break into a coughing fit.]
She actually came up to me to demand more books for her students. She said it was in our best interests. After all, what causes more suffering than to offer hope and pull it away at a later date ... That was her argument, to convince one of her oppressors to alleviate their pain even a little.
[His words trail off into something raw. He hadn't had a counter-argument at the time. At the time, he hadn't had any hope to see. He couldn't imagine anything more painful than to have it and lose it. He'd been through that already.
[Left unsaid: He'd given her the books.]