a thing; w/ ruinsprofessor & conductingresistance

[simulsimul]

universe list
canon
breached
confessed
dadly
future
grigori
mercenary
MEover
origin
reversal
titans


scenario list
canon: Kratos needs to stop running off
confessed: wing reflex
confessed: actual wingpull
confessed: turning Renegade
confessed: son meets father
dadliness: confrontation
dadliness: awakening
dadliness: illness
dadliness: a fundamental lack of understanding on the word 'abducted'
dadliness: updating parameters
dadliness: assassination assignation
mercenary: hiding in the library
mercenary: aftermath of librarian saviour
reversal: oracle destroyed
titans: storming the tower
titans: safety in the canyon
titans: night horrors


canon
- combo of Kratos and Zelos ending
- Zelos does the stupid thing, but not so far as his death, and is still the eighth member of the party to Derris-Kharlan.

scenarios
scenario one: Yuan tracks Kratos down at Dirk's.


breached
- canon right up until after Botta’s death
- no one uses Yuan’s name around Mithos so Mithos walks right into the Triet base with them
- cue an epic OH SHIT in which Yuan gets a lil bit beat up while covering the evacuation of the rest of the base
- until Kratos appears to intervene and have the Chosen group get Yuan out of there
- Mithos gets Kratos tho and he’s a bit mad cos, yanno, traitor and all
- time to be locked up and punished and need to be rescued
- kind of puts a crimp in the creation of the Eternal Ring plans
- mostly cos Mithos turns Kratos lifeless, with some armour to regulate his mana so he remains a seraph. can't have the seal becoming less powerful, yo
- it does mean he can only obey orders tho
- the first rescue fails miserably but at least no one dies and they know they need to reforge his key-crest
- the second rescue attempt (circumstances of canon-point under percolation) goes a little better, though Yuan almost gets killed by Kratos trying to attach the key-crest
- luckily that and the first telepathy in a while gets through and Kratos manages to break out a la Colette, and heal Yuan enough for Raine to get there
- after which, angreh father-son beatdown on Mithos.

scenarios
None yet.


confessed
- almost successful assassination lands Kratos as an injured stranger in Iselia (1-2 years pre-canon)
- recuperation leads to accidental-on-purpose 'holiday' in Iselia
- doubts result in a request for Dirk to make a key-crest like Kratos' own
- oracle room undergoes some stealth sabotage
- regeneration journey is slightly delayed, prompted by Genis and Lloyd being discovered at the ranch
- Triet is awkward. so very awkward. for the Renegades -- whose side is Kratos even on these days and why was he vanished for two years?
- initial overall journey similar to canon, save that Kratos is a bit less circumspect about advising Colette on how to cope with angel transformations
- there are more overt Dun Wanna Feelings
- then Luin, wherein things happen and the group is in town during the Desian attack. the others naturally want to fight but tis a mite difficult against an army and building-destroying magitech. luckily, angel on their side. unluckily, wingpulls in order to muster the power to cover the townspeoples' retreat
- questions and confessions ensue
- Colette rejects the key crest (for the moment) so there's still hopefully maybe ambiguity about Kratos's position re the last seal
- it wouldn't fit anyway, it's modelled for the hand like Kratos's is because he was a derp and did not specify otherwise, so Lloyd needs to make a thing to make it fit
- slow protective retreat toward Asgard.

scenarios
scenario one: Kratos confesses before Salvation; Raine wants to follow up.
scenario two: Raine's examination of an angel; and also Kratos realises how far he's put his foot in it.
scenario three: Kratos goes to taunt Yuan a little, and also ask for his help.
scenario four: in which Raine makes Kratos tell the children all the things, and Yuan takes too much amusement from it.


dadliness
- Kratos retires in Iselia under the name Irving to raise Lloyd after the death of his wife
- no exsphere. ageing occurs! so does a beard and a braid
- teaches Lloyd swordplay, but on the sly, to avoid the other villagers noticing. his daytime job is weaving
- Lloyd finds the box of their exspheres and wants details. after some prodding by Dirk, Kratos explains how exspheres are made and that one is Anna's life. Lloyd is too young yet, but when Lloyd comes of age (~15) Kratos lets him make his own decision re wearing it
- Lloyd chooses not to wear the exsphere
- Genis befriends Marble and Lloyd meets her, as in canon; this happens before the journey begins, with the fallout
- difference being that Colette is still in the village so they can't be too horrible, so they just demand Lloyd be turned over for a flogging
- Kratos stands in his stead because natch. luckily, they're only mooks and don't recognise the bearded weaver as anyone important
- gives Lloyd his guilt complex early tho
- the oracle happens much the same way except Botta doesn't quite recognise the weirdly familiar bearded swordsman
- he does when he's reporting to Yuan tho
      'there was an exceptionally skilled human'
      /brief physical description/
      /did x other faintly recognizable thing/
      and both he and Yuan are aware that Kratos has been awol for a while, so there's a moment of pure silence and dawning 'no, it couldn't be'
- but then obviously one of them has to go make sure
- cue an interruption just out of Triet.

scenarios
scenario one: Yuan feels the need to investigate; this results in Kratos injured and abducted.
scenario two: Yuan realises he can't kill Kratos with his own two hands; Kratos gets mothered.
scenario three: Kratos gets sick on the heels of his recovery. Yuan mothers him some more. Botta disapproves.
scenario four: Kratos recovers and makes an escape attempt. Sort-of.
scenario five: Kratos recovers more and talks to Botta, when not needling Yuan about his lack of preparedness.
scenario six: Sheena's contract takes a slight shift into undercover instead of assassination work.


future
- Aselia is Earth ~10,000 years in the past
- all is peachy-keen except the tree is now underground and the elvens/half-elves/some humans are in hiding in the centre of the planet, hidden thanks to the summon spirits
- Colette is working with humanitarian aid in various impoverished nations
- Zelos is a diplomat in West Asia / Middle East trying to keep the peace
- Yuan is a crotchety lecturer at Cambridge who's also HUGE into environmentalism
- Lloyd and Kratos are having family time in space
- occasionally the trio on Earth meet reincarnations of people they used to know
- but rarely at the same time and almost never in a position where they meet
- but then they start meeting them
- lots of them
- all in the same span of years
- they're starting to think something's hinky
- until the space-elves attack
- and then they know something is hinky.


scenarios
None yet.


grigori
- at some point significantly before canon, Kratos actually calls it quits
- the Church's institution calls him a fallen angel of vengeance
- really he's just going around trying to help people and avoiding being taken back to Cruxis
- assigns himself to the Chosen parties whenever he can, up to Colette
- ????? idk some kind of profit somewhere

scenarios
None yet.


mercenary
- when Yuan visits Kratos at the beach when Lloyd is 3 months old, he does not manage to escape before Anna and Lloyd return
- accidental attachment to this kidlet who likes pulling his hair
- three years later, Yuan can't stand to hold back while Kratos fights Kvar, so he throws caution to the wind to help
- Anna is still killed but they rescue Lloyd and Noishe and both are branded as traitors
- Lloyd is raised as a Renegade with Dad, Uncle Yuan and the extremely reticent Uncle Botta (how dare)
- meanwhile in Tethe'alla Yuan infiltrates the castle as the library archivist
- stays out of sight, mostly, but has a good ear around the politics thanks to recruiting Princess Hilda
- also happens to stumble on Zelos hiding in the library right after his mother's death
- look he's got a 'nephew' he can't just do nothing (even if all he meant was to recommend a book)
- unwittingly accidentally 'adopts' the Tethe'allan Chosen by virtue of being the only one who doesn't treat him like the Chosen
- sometimes Kratos brings Lloyd to visit and basically they're all separate pairs of exasperated bros
- by canon Lloyd and Kratos are wandering mercenaries, helping people on the sly while gathering intel to send back to the Renegades
- Yuan and Zelos are actively building resistance to the Church using inside knowledge
- the ninja are all Renegades
- Colette is escorted by Raine and by the priests
- yes the 'chain up the Chosen and drag her to every seal if necessary' priests
- she meets Lloyd randomly in Triet but Lloyd doesn't know her as the Chosen. they're a bit out of touch on the Journey of Regen timeline
- stuff happens and they keep missing each other up until Palmacosta, which is a warzone between the Desians (and Dorr as their figurehead) and the Renegades (with Neil as their leader)
- Colette wants to help; priests say no
- out come the chains
- Raine objects, but she has no exsphere so what can she do
- btw Genis got caught in the Iselian ranch and tossed in as a traitor to be made a host
- he gets sent to the Palmacosta ranch
- right after Neil manages to take the city, after Colette and Raine leave it, Botta takes the Palmacosta ranch and rescues Genis, among others
- Genis becomes his little shadow and is much preferable to Lloyd, in Botta's opinion
- Lloyd and Kratos are still trying to catch up to Colette to rescue her when they drop by
- Genis hears what they're trying to do and insists on coming along.


scenarios
scenario one: in which Yuan accidentally adopts a Chosen instead of a book from a library.
scenario two: in which Yuan is accidentally-deliberately adopted by the Meltokio Castle Knights.


MEover
- Mass Effect crossover someplace in the realm of 15,000 years after TOS canon
- except started before then, cos elves are really from Feros, planet of the cranky telepathic plant
- got decimated by the protheans trying to assimilate them into their empire
- elves objected, got killed a lot, fled Feros and got stuck in Aselia's orbit
- kinda forgot a few things but planted a seed from the Ferosian mother plant on Aselia
- Origin hasn't forgotten tho, kinda has a grudge against grumblegrumbleprotheansgrumble
- the entirety of TOS happened, and then some
- Kratos, Yuan, Lloyd, Colette and Zelos are the only ones left, but tis okay, they have each other
- somethingsomething natural space disaster, Aselia is destroyed but they manage to move Yggdrasill onto Derris-Kharlan and do a quarian by becoming a roaming ship
- mana is a variant of eezo lbr
- Derris-Kharlan's too big to use the mass relays, but c'mon it generates its own mass effect field so they develop tech to do hops on their own
- they're in no hurry tho, i mean lbr primarily angelic, elf and half-elf population
- so they're just bumming around their local clusters doing thorough investigations on all the things
- so much eezo on their ship
- so much
- suddenly the Normandy running from a reapers comes along to hide behind them
- reapers start shooting
- everyone on Derris-Kharlan objects
- JUDGEMENT IN SPACE
- so much profit and judging of reapers.


scenarios
None yet.


origin
- Kratos tells Lloyd the dad thing in Triet
- dad and son feelings ensue
- they culminate at the Tower of Salvation in Kratos stabbing Yggdrasill in the back
- unfortunately he does not quite die but impales Kratos against a wall and goes berserk on the Chosen party to the point of Yuan stepping in to help
- that is, by threatening to stab Kratos in the back while he's vulnerable (with Kratos's permission)
- Yggdrasill calls his bluff and fails, and Yuan does the thing
- while Yggdrasill is distracted the Chosen's group nail him but good and he retreats
- luckily while heart-stabbing happened, Kratos's cruxis crystal is still intact, and between Raine's healing and Yuan's mana transfusion he survives long enough to be taken to the Triet base and a refresher
- stuff happens in some fashion or other up until opening Origin's seal
- as it turns out, the mana tranfusion has fused the lock, so to speak, and Kratos can't unlock the seal even voluntarily
- only way to get Origin out at this point is to let him fuse with Kratos, so Kratos becomes Origin
- stipulation of this: Kratos refuses to let go of his humanity
- luckily Yuan already has a literal bond with him thanks to the mana transfusion, so with him as his summoner Kratos can keep his humanity, and only use Origin's powers when Yuan summons them
- commitment like woah for a literal eternity
- but hey, they messed up but good and it's the only way they can reunite the worlds.

scenarios
none yet.


reversal
~ 2000 years in, Kratos and Yuan conspire to kill Mithos and succeed, sorta
- he's stuck inside his exsphere, possessing people
- but he manages to survive and while Kratos and Yuan claim Derris-Kharlan for their base, he takes most of the angels as 'fallen', as well as the Eternal Sword
- most of his bases are hidden behind dimensional slips created by the sword - Iselia included
- Origin refuses to trust either Kratos or Yuan with the job, anyhow, and they don't have a summoner
- instead they're forced to fight Cruxis, embroiling the worlds in an angelic war between Cruxis and the new organisation of Chayim
- the Chosen bloodlines are more important to Cruxis than Chayim, but Mithos seals the seals so only the Chosen bloodline can flip the mana switch. Kratos and Yuan need someone to do that until they can reunite them, so the Journey remains an institution, just without compulsory death at the end
- there is angelification tho, if only so Chayim gets more soldiers and so the Chosen can defend themselves against Cruxis
- Kratos sends Anna and Lloyd to Iselia, because even though enemy territory, it's the safest place there is for them
- Anna get word to Kratos that the Desians are using Iselia as a long-term cruxis crystal cultivation location, and that the sword is held there
- her spy succeeds but is intercepted, and Mithos locks down the dimensional slip to prevent exit and access by angels for ~15 years
- Lloyd grows up in a town with a heavy half-elf population and believing he's training to help the good guys
- he has his own cruxis crystal as a host, but doesn't tell his mother due to the faith-based propaganda encouraging hosts not to bring it up or risk the powers not taking
- he wants to help though, so he steals a key-crest to ensure he can fight
- Yuan and Kratos plan to assault the town and shrine but Mithos uses the sword to interrupt travel between worlds, keeping Yuan in Tethe'alla and forcing Kratos to attack Iselia alone.

scenarios
scenario one: Iselia is attacked by Chayim to claim the sword, with the sword already gone


titans
- Yggdrasill captures Kratos before Kvar finds Anna and Lloyd, but after Kratos makes an Eternal Ring
- Yuan figures hell no and raises the Renegades to try and take Derris-Kharlan, rescue Kratos and solve the split-world problem
- the attack fails. a lot.
- Renegades are wiped out, Kratos is still in Cruxis's hands, but Yuan manages to escape with the Eternal Ring
- Cruxis follows him to Triet base, which gets destroyed and the few remaining Renegades scatter
- Botta is still around tho, helping out how he can
- mostly Yuan just goes searching for Lloyd and Anna
- doesn't manage to find them before Kvar does tho, and Kratos hears from Yggdrasill that they're dead
- this is slightly inaccurate, cos Lloyd still winds up rescued by Dirk in Iselia
- where Yuan eventually finds him, not knowing that he's 'supposed' to be dead
- so Yuan settles in Iselia for a bit to watch Lloyd and the Chosen
- cuts and dyes his hair, the whole shebang
- learns how to carpentry, invents a new use of magic lightning and light can totally become a laserbeam amirite
- winds up being Genis's role model just because scholar and magic-user and half-elf who can pass but also takes no shit from people
- is one of Colette's companions on the Journey when it starts
- he's been challenging their understanding of the Church's institution this whole time lbr
- Sheena is still a thing because the ninja have taken over the Tethe'allan base, which has survived, somewhat
- a grilling ensues
- sometime just after the Asgard Ranch Yuan does have to drop the bombshell
- about how the Journey is just a front, he and his bestie are angels, btw his bestie is Lloyd's dad
- how they're out to topple the institution of religion
- forget sacrificing Colette for the Regeneration, when they get to the seal they can do that without anyone dying
- and then move straight on to rescuing Kratos in Derris-Kharlan
- then they get to the Tower and realise Yggdrasill has Kratos under a Prometheusesque punishment a la 'impaled on the Eternal Sword to suffer the Seed's pain and watch the Chosen get murdered'
- luckily this does not happen, as they manage to rescue him and escape Yggdrasill instead, barely
- retreat to Botta's hiding-place in Asgard so Kratos can recover
- and also find out that Lloyd is actually alive
- the Chosen group goes around to make as many pacts as they can while in Sylvarant
- they get up to Aska when Yggdrasill sends his angels to attack Asgard
- cue Yuan and Kratos being unstoppable battle gods together


scenarios
scenario one: in which Yuan leads the Chosen's party to the Tower of Salvation to dismantle all the traditions ever, and find Kratos waiting for them in serious need of a rescue.
scenario two: in which being in safety reveals that Kratos is not precisely unscathed, but he's doing his best.
scenario three: in which Kratos is emphatically not okay, but with Yuan's help, could be.

Comments

[conductingresistance]

Kratos, you have a minute to respond with something sensible or I'm going to assume you're dying and act accordingly.

[Yuan catches him by the shoulders when he raises up, trying to steady him, somehow utterly at a loss for what to do with this damnably human thing. Even back when they were first traveling together Kratos was never like this.]

[At least Yuan himself doesn't have to worry about catching something.]

...water?

[simulsimul]

[Wordless and grimacing, Kratos manages to nod just once, and reaches out a shaking hand for the water while keeping himself semi-upright. He needs a bit of help to hold it, however, and his face twists with every swallow until his throat is soothed enough for him to whisper hoarsely:]

I'm not dying. This is normal.

[Where Yuan's concerned, 'act accordingly' could mean anything from kidnapping a Tethe'allan doctor to forcibly attaching the cruxis crystal. Kratos isn't always relegated to a bed, but most times that's what happens, and it's never reached the level of turning into something like pneumonia, unlike some of the villagers in the past. Still, the way he moves to lay his head back down is ginger, and there's a general air of weariness and lethargy about him as he closes his eyes.]

Read to me.

[The silence is nearly as bad as the way he's feeling. Frank had a tendency to read to his bed-ridden patients; it had been strange, the first few times. As Lloyd got older, and it became clear Kratos getting sick was going to be a regular occurrence, Lloyd had taken over the duty. The result is that history is one of the few subjects at school which Lloyd actually enjoys, and that Kratos feels lonely without a voice in the background while he's recuperating.]

[conductingresistance]

Normal.

[This is repeated flatly, as though Yuan can't believe what he's hearing.]

[But he helps with the water, takes Kratos' weight when he lays back down, and when he's satisfied that Kratos is not about to expire Yuan sits back and frowns at him.]

[This is ridiculous. He considers rejecting the proposal on simple principle, and also the fact that he has other things to do.]

[However, Kratos is exceptionally pathetic right now.]

...fine.

[Yuan gets up to retrieve the book Kratos had been reading.]

Tell me you were considerate enough to mark your place... ah, I see.

[simulsimul]

Mnh. I found the romance.

[It's a bit mumbled, because talking loudly is not conducive to helping Kratos's throat, and because Yuan would be able to hear him anyway.]

It seems to be gearing up to include 'everybody'.

[By which he is not surprised, because Mizuho, but which so far is more amusing than the standard Tethe'allan romances (even the ones from four thousand years ago). The Mizuho classics had always been the most fun to act, precisely because of ridiculous plots.

[Kratos is only thankful Yuan doesn't know about that, or he'd have no ground to stand on while teasing Yuan about his choice of literature.]

[conductingresistance]

[Such a shame that there's no one who can carry tales of Kratos' wild youth.]

[Yuan finds where Kratos was, or at least the same page, and gives the book an amused smile. Mostly, it must be said, for Kratos' disdain; but he does enjoy it himself, after all.]

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

[And yes, there is an edge of dry humor there.]

[He starts at the top of the page, and begins to read.]

[simulsimul]

You always say that, right before I'm unpleasantly surprised.

[That, too, is mumbled, but there may be something edging toward a smile in the corner of Kratos's mouth. For all Yuan's prickliness, he does have a good voice; it isn't long before Kratos drowses, however uncomfortable it is.

[This situation continues through the day, interspersed with hacking coughing fits and blind gropes for the glass of water. Sometimes Kratos dozes; sometimes he does a good job of trying while listening to Yuan's voice and only half listening to the actual words. Afternoon turns into evening turns into night.

[By the time Kratos wakes up in the morning he's bleary-eyed and still fairly miserable, and his hacking coughs still sound awful, but the raging ache in his throat has eased off and his sinuses are unclogging themselves. Unfortunately, this means the substantial use of tissues hardly before his eyes are open, which means that the morning is heralded by some particularly annoying 'human sounds', and a growl of discontent.

[The third day is the day of grumpiness. At least he's also somewhat hungry this time around. And in dire need of a bath.]

[conductingresistance]

[Food is there when Kratos wakes up that third day, on a covered tray next to the neatly marked book. Yuan has either been and gone, or simply gone.]

[Some little time later, brisk and spitefully in perfect health, Yuan walks into the room to give Kratos a skeptically raised eyebrow.]

This is getting better?

[But he's coming over nevertheless, in concession to Kratos' general weakness of the last few days.]

[simulsimul]

[The food is welcome, even soup, and Kratos actually manages to eat it all -- even if slowly, and with the last inch or so being fairly cold by the time he can manage it. But he eats, and as a result he's a bit more lively, with the result that he glares spitefully at Yuan's very pointed entry.]

Yes.

[Grumpily. He's sitting up, at least, even if he doesn't look much better; the braid is nearly beyond help, and his clothes are getting fairly rumpled by this point. Kratos is emphatically not going to mention that he tried to shower, which resulted in falling over before he reached the bathroom.

[It's Yuan's fault. He was hard on Kratos's knees during the fight. And the bathroom is at least ten feet away, too far for someone who's been sick, and at an inconvenient angle which makes it impossible to use the wall. Kratos would entirely have made it without help, otherwise.]

[conductingresistance]

I suppose you aren't trying to cough your lungs out any more.

[Yuan gives Kratos a flat line of a face right back. This is, as far as he's concerned, entirely Kratos' fault. He could fix this. He's choosing not to. Not many people can say they have the choice about these sorts of things.]

Kratos, do you need help with something?

[Trying and failing not to sound too pleased with himself.]

[simulsimul]

[Damn it. Of course Yuan would have checked the surveillance beforehand. Of course. Kratos's mouth gets thinner and his eyes narrow, and he makes a promise to himself that there will be coconut-related foods in the near future.]

I can't reach the bathroom without a support.

[It's not a grudging admission so much as a flat statement of fact. A moment later he adds, equally flatly:]

Smugness is terribly unattractive, you know.

[conductingresistance]

How fortunate then that I'm not trying to attract you.

[Yuan spares a moment more to look irritatingly superior; but he does offer Kratos his hand, and is gracious enough not to simply scoop him out of bed.]

[At least partially because this would result in Yuan getting punched.]

[simulsimul]

[At least Yuan has some sense of self-preservation, though his avoidance of picking Kratos up wholesale will not save him from the coconut dishes. Kratos eyes his hand for a moment before grudgingly taking it and sliding off the bed, leaning on Yuan's arm.]

Are you sure? With the way you've been hovering I've started to wonder.

[Despite the words, his voice is still eminently flat.]

[conductingresistance]

Clearly I'll just have to leave you alone to fall over.

[The eyeroll is implicit in his tone, if not his gestures. Yuan refrains from offering any further support, but steadies Kratos toward the bathroom.]

[Other sarcasm dies unspoken, too close to casual joking for his tastes as they stand.]

How much support do you need?

[simulsimul]

[The only comeback Kratos has to that is a grunt, and he takes the distance between the bed and the bathroom a touch quicker than is strictly wise, if only to prove to Yuan that he only needed some help.]

Just to the bathroom.

[This is said shortly; Kratos would drown in the shower than need that level of help. He's aware that if Raine were here she'd be lecturing him about pride, but fortunately, Raine isn't here. Kratos reaches the bathroom first only because he's the one leading, and closes the door sharply in Yuan's face behind him.

[Third day grumps? Third day grumps.]

[conductingresistance]

[Grumpy, petulant, and slamming doors. Kratos is doing an excellent impression of a five-year-old.]

[Yuan looks down his nose at the door like Kratos will feel the weight of his disdain anyway. After a moment:]

You're going to have to come out eventually. You can't live in the bathroom.

[Part of him cannot even believe he is having this conversation.]

[simulsimul]

[Kratos's cutting words come through the closed door almost at once.]

If you can't last for ten seconds, Yuan, I wonder how you survived the last four thousand years.

[The first order of business is taking care of some most pressing business. Then it's to undress, for which Kratos needs the use of the wall; but he manages it alone, even if it takes a little while.]

[conductingresistance]

[Yuan hasn't been tongue-tied with anger in forever. He'd forgotten how uniquely frustrating Kratos could be when he puts his mind to it. He walks away from the door, paces a short circle, and frowns.]

I think I heard a request for tomato soup, didn't you?

[This is petty and utterly unnecessary and he knows it.]

[simulsimul]

[Kratos has managed to divest himself of clothes and have a towel wrapped around him by the time Yuan's words come filtering through, and if only because the anger feels good, the energy it gives him feels good after three days of being bed-ridden, Kratos stalks back to the door to yank it open sharply.]

Do not test me with the kitchen, Yuan. You'll be eating coconut from now until the reunification.

[Then the door is closed again, sharply (not with a slam!), and Kratos moves toward the shower, yanking impatiently at the rubber-band in his hair to free his braid.]

[conductingresistance]

[Yuan is torn between laughter and the determination that Kratos will not find that as easy as he thinks it is.]

I can cuff both your hands and move to Tethe'alla.

[Some part of him recognizes how dazzlingly immature they're both being now. And yet he can't quite make himself stop, either.]

You seem to be under some misapprehensions about what prisoners can get into.

[simulsimul]

I can cook in handcuffs, Yuan!

[Kratos can't remember the last time he's felt this way. He's been feeling his emotions more cleanly in the last twenty years than in centuries, but even then, with the exasperated frustration of raising a teenage boy, he hasn't felt so pettily, vindicatingly angry. He remembers it, vaguely, from long ago; but the memory is hazy.

[And it still feels good.

[He turns on the shower, and shouts over it.]

I can cook in handcuffs and then I can send care packages!

[conductingresistance]

To the bed, Kratos.

[Having made this clarification at rather a louder volume than it absolutely necessitated, Yuan crosses the room again to loiter by the bathroom door, leaning against the wall with his arms folded.]

[Mostly, it must be said, so he can continue prodding Kratos verbally.]

What makes you think I'll open them?

[simulsimul]

Hah! And who would you get to hand feed me once you had?

[Kratos's words are whiplash cutting and snide, and also louder than they have to be, even accounting for the sound of the shower running. He hangs up his towel and steps under the hot water, leaning with his elbows against the wall.

[Hot running water. Bless. One thing he doesn't miss about Iselia is the lack of hot running water.]

I'd mislabel them as vital correspondence!

[conductingresistance]

[Despite himself, one corner of Yuan's mouth turns up very briefly.]

I don't need to eat. I can toss them as soon as I open them.

[He'll still have to deal with them existing, but compared to everything they faced, a coconut dish or two doesn't genuinely frighten him.]

[simulsimul]

I'll steal your cruxis crystal before you leave.

[Now they're just getting into ridiculousness, and Kratos knows it. Even as he stands in the shower with hot water pounding on his back, his head hanging between his arms and wet hair dripping, there's a smile on his face.

[More quietly, too quietly for a human to hear over the sound of the shower-water but not, perhaps, for an augmented half-elf:]

I missed you.

[conductingresistance]

[Hah. Yuan barks a short, amused laugh. He'd like to see Kratos try.]

[He almost thinks he's imagined the last words at first, a scarce whisper at the edges of his hearing. Not telepathy, though, and Yuan isn't in the habit of auditory hallucinations.]

You'll have to get your hands on yours, first.

[Which Yuan still has, somehow.]

[It's only a shame any response to that last is going to have to be loud enough for Kratos to hear; in light of that, Yuan opts to wait until he won't be shouting over a shower.]