a thing; w/ ruinsprofessor & conductingresistance

[simulsimul]

universe list
canon
breached
confessed
dadly
future
grigori
mercenary
MEover
origin
reversal
titans


scenario list
canon: Kratos needs to stop running off
confessed: wing reflex
confessed: actual wingpull
confessed: turning Renegade
confessed: son meets father
dadliness: confrontation
dadliness: awakening
dadliness: illness
dadliness: a fundamental lack of understanding on the word 'abducted'
dadliness: updating parameters
dadliness: assassination assignation
mercenary: hiding in the library
mercenary: aftermath of librarian saviour
reversal: oracle destroyed
titans: storming the tower
titans: safety in the canyon
titans: night horrors


canon
- combo of Kratos and Zelos ending
- Zelos does the stupid thing, but not so far as his death, and is still the eighth member of the party to Derris-Kharlan.

scenarios
scenario one: Yuan tracks Kratos down at Dirk's.


breached
- canon right up until after Botta’s death
- no one uses Yuan’s name around Mithos so Mithos walks right into the Triet base with them
- cue an epic OH SHIT in which Yuan gets a lil bit beat up while covering the evacuation of the rest of the base
- until Kratos appears to intervene and have the Chosen group get Yuan out of there
- Mithos gets Kratos tho and he’s a bit mad cos, yanno, traitor and all
- time to be locked up and punished and need to be rescued
- kind of puts a crimp in the creation of the Eternal Ring plans
- mostly cos Mithos turns Kratos lifeless, with some armour to regulate his mana so he remains a seraph. can't have the seal becoming less powerful, yo
- it does mean he can only obey orders tho
- the first rescue fails miserably but at least no one dies and they know they need to reforge his key-crest
- the second rescue attempt (circumstances of canon-point under percolation) goes a little better, though Yuan almost gets killed by Kratos trying to attach the key-crest
- luckily that and the first telepathy in a while gets through and Kratos manages to break out a la Colette, and heal Yuan enough for Raine to get there
- after which, angreh father-son beatdown on Mithos.

scenarios
None yet.


confessed
- almost successful assassination lands Kratos as an injured stranger in Iselia (1-2 years pre-canon)
- recuperation leads to accidental-on-purpose 'holiday' in Iselia
- doubts result in a request for Dirk to make a key-crest like Kratos' own
- oracle room undergoes some stealth sabotage
- regeneration journey is slightly delayed, prompted by Genis and Lloyd being discovered at the ranch
- Triet is awkward. so very awkward. for the Renegades -- whose side is Kratos even on these days and why was he vanished for two years?
- initial overall journey similar to canon, save that Kratos is a bit less circumspect about advising Colette on how to cope with angel transformations
- there are more overt Dun Wanna Feelings
- then Luin, wherein things happen and the group is in town during the Desian attack. the others naturally want to fight but tis a mite difficult against an army and building-destroying magitech. luckily, angel on their side. unluckily, wingpulls in order to muster the power to cover the townspeoples' retreat
- questions and confessions ensue
- Colette rejects the key crest (for the moment) so there's still hopefully maybe ambiguity about Kratos's position re the last seal
- it wouldn't fit anyway, it's modelled for the hand like Kratos's is because he was a derp and did not specify otherwise, so Lloyd needs to make a thing to make it fit
- slow protective retreat toward Asgard.

scenarios
scenario one: Kratos confesses before Salvation; Raine wants to follow up.
scenario two: Raine's examination of an angel; and also Kratos realises how far he's put his foot in it.
scenario three: Kratos goes to taunt Yuan a little, and also ask for his help.
scenario four: in which Raine makes Kratos tell the children all the things, and Yuan takes too much amusement from it.


dadliness
- Kratos retires in Iselia under the name Irving to raise Lloyd after the death of his wife
- no exsphere. ageing occurs! so does a beard and a braid
- teaches Lloyd swordplay, but on the sly, to avoid the other villagers noticing. his daytime job is weaving
- Lloyd finds the box of their exspheres and wants details. after some prodding by Dirk, Kratos explains how exspheres are made and that one is Anna's life. Lloyd is too young yet, but when Lloyd comes of age (~15) Kratos lets him make his own decision re wearing it
- Lloyd chooses not to wear the exsphere
- Genis befriends Marble and Lloyd meets her, as in canon; this happens before the journey begins, with the fallout
- difference being that Colette is still in the village so they can't be too horrible, so they just demand Lloyd be turned over for a flogging
- Kratos stands in his stead because natch. luckily, they're only mooks and don't recognise the bearded weaver as anyone important
- gives Lloyd his guilt complex early tho
- the oracle happens much the same way except Botta doesn't quite recognise the weirdly familiar bearded swordsman
- he does when he's reporting to Yuan tho
      'there was an exceptionally skilled human'
      /brief physical description/
      /did x other faintly recognizable thing/
      and both he and Yuan are aware that Kratos has been awol for a while, so there's a moment of pure silence and dawning 'no, it couldn't be'
- but then obviously one of them has to go make sure
- cue an interruption just out of Triet.

scenarios
scenario one: Yuan feels the need to investigate; this results in Kratos injured and abducted.
scenario two: Yuan realises he can't kill Kratos with his own two hands; Kratos gets mothered.
scenario three: Kratos gets sick on the heels of his recovery. Yuan mothers him some more. Botta disapproves.
scenario four: Kratos recovers and makes an escape attempt. Sort-of.
scenario five: Kratos recovers more and talks to Botta, when not needling Yuan about his lack of preparedness.
scenario six: Sheena's contract takes a slight shift into undercover instead of assassination work.


future
- Aselia is Earth ~10,000 years in the past
- all is peachy-keen except the tree is now underground and the elvens/half-elves/some humans are in hiding in the centre of the planet, hidden thanks to the summon spirits
- Colette is working with humanitarian aid in various impoverished nations
- Zelos is a diplomat in West Asia / Middle East trying to keep the peace
- Yuan is a crotchety lecturer at Cambridge who's also HUGE into environmentalism
- Lloyd and Kratos are having family time in space
- occasionally the trio on Earth meet reincarnations of people they used to know
- but rarely at the same time and almost never in a position where they meet
- but then they start meeting them
- lots of them
- all in the same span of years
- they're starting to think something's hinky
- until the space-elves attack
- and then they know something is hinky.


scenarios
None yet.


grigori
- at some point significantly before canon, Kratos actually calls it quits
- the Church's institution calls him a fallen angel of vengeance
- really he's just going around trying to help people and avoiding being taken back to Cruxis
- assigns himself to the Chosen parties whenever he can, up to Colette
- ????? idk some kind of profit somewhere

scenarios
None yet.


mercenary
- when Yuan visits Kratos at the beach when Lloyd is 3 months old, he does not manage to escape before Anna and Lloyd return
- accidental attachment to this kidlet who likes pulling his hair
- three years later, Yuan can't stand to hold back while Kratos fights Kvar, so he throws caution to the wind to help
- Anna is still killed but they rescue Lloyd and Noishe and both are branded as traitors
- Lloyd is raised as a Renegade with Dad, Uncle Yuan and the extremely reticent Uncle Botta (how dare)
- meanwhile in Tethe'alla Yuan infiltrates the castle as the library archivist
- stays out of sight, mostly, but has a good ear around the politics thanks to recruiting Princess Hilda
- also happens to stumble on Zelos hiding in the library right after his mother's death
- look he's got a 'nephew' he can't just do nothing (even if all he meant was to recommend a book)
- unwittingly accidentally 'adopts' the Tethe'allan Chosen by virtue of being the only one who doesn't treat him like the Chosen
- sometimes Kratos brings Lloyd to visit and basically they're all separate pairs of exasperated bros
- by canon Lloyd and Kratos are wandering mercenaries, helping people on the sly while gathering intel to send back to the Renegades
- Yuan and Zelos are actively building resistance to the Church using inside knowledge
- the ninja are all Renegades
- Colette is escorted by Raine and by the priests
- yes the 'chain up the Chosen and drag her to every seal if necessary' priests
- she meets Lloyd randomly in Triet but Lloyd doesn't know her as the Chosen. they're a bit out of touch on the Journey of Regen timeline
- stuff happens and they keep missing each other up until Palmacosta, which is a warzone between the Desians (and Dorr as their figurehead) and the Renegades (with Neil as their leader)
- Colette wants to help; priests say no
- out come the chains
- Raine objects, but she has no exsphere so what can she do
- btw Genis got caught in the Iselian ranch and tossed in as a traitor to be made a host
- he gets sent to the Palmacosta ranch
- right after Neil manages to take the city, after Colette and Raine leave it, Botta takes the Palmacosta ranch and rescues Genis, among others
- Genis becomes his little shadow and is much preferable to Lloyd, in Botta's opinion
- Lloyd and Kratos are still trying to catch up to Colette to rescue her when they drop by
- Genis hears what they're trying to do and insists on coming along.


scenarios
scenario one: in which Yuan accidentally adopts a Chosen instead of a book from a library.
scenario two: in which Yuan is accidentally-deliberately adopted by the Meltokio Castle Knights.


MEover
- Mass Effect crossover someplace in the realm of 15,000 years after TOS canon
- except started before then, cos elves are really from Feros, planet of the cranky telepathic plant
- got decimated by the protheans trying to assimilate them into their empire
- elves objected, got killed a lot, fled Feros and got stuck in Aselia's orbit
- kinda forgot a few things but planted a seed from the Ferosian mother plant on Aselia
- Origin hasn't forgotten tho, kinda has a grudge against grumblegrumbleprotheansgrumble
- the entirety of TOS happened, and then some
- Kratos, Yuan, Lloyd, Colette and Zelos are the only ones left, but tis okay, they have each other
- somethingsomething natural space disaster, Aselia is destroyed but they manage to move Yggdrasill onto Derris-Kharlan and do a quarian by becoming a roaming ship
- mana is a variant of eezo lbr
- Derris-Kharlan's too big to use the mass relays, but c'mon it generates its own mass effect field so they develop tech to do hops on their own
- they're in no hurry tho, i mean lbr primarily angelic, elf and half-elf population
- so they're just bumming around their local clusters doing thorough investigations on all the things
- so much eezo on their ship
- so much
- suddenly the Normandy running from a reapers comes along to hide behind them
- reapers start shooting
- everyone on Derris-Kharlan objects
- JUDGEMENT IN SPACE
- so much profit and judging of reapers.


scenarios
None yet.


origin
- Kratos tells Lloyd the dad thing in Triet
- dad and son feelings ensue
- they culminate at the Tower of Salvation in Kratos stabbing Yggdrasill in the back
- unfortunately he does not quite die but impales Kratos against a wall and goes berserk on the Chosen party to the point of Yuan stepping in to help
- that is, by threatening to stab Kratos in the back while he's vulnerable (with Kratos's permission)
- Yggdrasill calls his bluff and fails, and Yuan does the thing
- while Yggdrasill is distracted the Chosen's group nail him but good and he retreats
- luckily while heart-stabbing happened, Kratos's cruxis crystal is still intact, and between Raine's healing and Yuan's mana transfusion he survives long enough to be taken to the Triet base and a refresher
- stuff happens in some fashion or other up until opening Origin's seal
- as it turns out, the mana tranfusion has fused the lock, so to speak, and Kratos can't unlock the seal even voluntarily
- only way to get Origin out at this point is to let him fuse with Kratos, so Kratos becomes Origin
- stipulation of this: Kratos refuses to let go of his humanity
- luckily Yuan already has a literal bond with him thanks to the mana transfusion, so with him as his summoner Kratos can keep his humanity, and only use Origin's powers when Yuan summons them
- commitment like woah for a literal eternity
- but hey, they messed up but good and it's the only way they can reunite the worlds.

scenarios
none yet.


reversal
~ 2000 years in, Kratos and Yuan conspire to kill Mithos and succeed, sorta
- he's stuck inside his exsphere, possessing people
- but he manages to survive and while Kratos and Yuan claim Derris-Kharlan for their base, he takes most of the angels as 'fallen', as well as the Eternal Sword
- most of his bases are hidden behind dimensional slips created by the sword - Iselia included
- Origin refuses to trust either Kratos or Yuan with the job, anyhow, and they don't have a summoner
- instead they're forced to fight Cruxis, embroiling the worlds in an angelic war between Cruxis and the new organisation of Chayim
- the Chosen bloodlines are more important to Cruxis than Chayim, but Mithos seals the seals so only the Chosen bloodline can flip the mana switch. Kratos and Yuan need someone to do that until they can reunite them, so the Journey remains an institution, just without compulsory death at the end
- there is angelification tho, if only so Chayim gets more soldiers and so the Chosen can defend themselves against Cruxis
- Kratos sends Anna and Lloyd to Iselia, because even though enemy territory, it's the safest place there is for them
- Anna get word to Kratos that the Desians are using Iselia as a long-term cruxis crystal cultivation location, and that the sword is held there
- her spy succeeds but is intercepted, and Mithos locks down the dimensional slip to prevent exit and access by angels for ~15 years
- Lloyd grows up in a town with a heavy half-elf population and believing he's training to help the good guys
- he has his own cruxis crystal as a host, but doesn't tell his mother due to the faith-based propaganda encouraging hosts not to bring it up or risk the powers not taking
- he wants to help though, so he steals a key-crest to ensure he can fight
- Yuan and Kratos plan to assault the town and shrine but Mithos uses the sword to interrupt travel between worlds, keeping Yuan in Tethe'alla and forcing Kratos to attack Iselia alone.

scenarios
scenario one: Iselia is attacked by Chayim to claim the sword, with the sword already gone


titans
- Yggdrasill captures Kratos before Kvar finds Anna and Lloyd, but after Kratos makes an Eternal Ring
- Yuan figures hell no and raises the Renegades to try and take Derris-Kharlan, rescue Kratos and solve the split-world problem
- the attack fails. a lot.
- Renegades are wiped out, Kratos is still in Cruxis's hands, but Yuan manages to escape with the Eternal Ring
- Cruxis follows him to Triet base, which gets destroyed and the few remaining Renegades scatter
- Botta is still around tho, helping out how he can
- mostly Yuan just goes searching for Lloyd and Anna
- doesn't manage to find them before Kvar does tho, and Kratos hears from Yggdrasill that they're dead
- this is slightly inaccurate, cos Lloyd still winds up rescued by Dirk in Iselia
- where Yuan eventually finds him, not knowing that he's 'supposed' to be dead
- so Yuan settles in Iselia for a bit to watch Lloyd and the Chosen
- cuts and dyes his hair, the whole shebang
- learns how to carpentry, invents a new use of magic lightning and light can totally become a laserbeam amirite
- winds up being Genis's role model just because scholar and magic-user and half-elf who can pass but also takes no shit from people
- is one of Colette's companions on the Journey when it starts
- he's been challenging their understanding of the Church's institution this whole time lbr
- Sheena is still a thing because the ninja have taken over the Tethe'allan base, which has survived, somewhat
- a grilling ensues
- sometime just after the Asgard Ranch Yuan does have to drop the bombshell
- about how the Journey is just a front, he and his bestie are angels, btw his bestie is Lloyd's dad
- how they're out to topple the institution of religion
- forget sacrificing Colette for the Regeneration, when they get to the seal they can do that without anyone dying
- and then move straight on to rescuing Kratos in Derris-Kharlan
- then they get to the Tower and realise Yggdrasill has Kratos under a Prometheusesque punishment a la 'impaled on the Eternal Sword to suffer the Seed's pain and watch the Chosen get murdered'
- luckily this does not happen, as they manage to rescue him and escape Yggdrasill instead, barely
- retreat to Botta's hiding-place in Asgard so Kratos can recover
- and also find out that Lloyd is actually alive
- the Chosen group goes around to make as many pacts as they can while in Sylvarant
- they get up to Aska when Yggdrasill sends his angels to attack Asgard
- cue Yuan and Kratos being unstoppable battle gods together


scenarios
scenario one: in which Yuan leads the Chosen's party to the Tower of Salvation to dismantle all the traditions ever, and find Kratos waiting for them in serious need of a rescue.
scenario two: in which being in safety reveals that Kratos is not precisely unscathed, but he's doing his best.
scenario three: in which Kratos is emphatically not okay, but with Yuan's help, could be.

Comments

[conductingresistance]

[The worst part is that Yuan wants to do something, that once he hears Kratos weeping in the night. He wants to reach out, even knowing Kratos has since killed two of the people that Yuan swore to see home again. Even knowing this is not somewhere he can safely put his trust.]

[He curls into himself a little more that night and says nothing.]

[They stay there only long enough to recoup before pressing forward. It is now proven too dangerous to stay settled long. Camp is struck, moved on in efficient pieces.]

[Yuan... wonders what would happen if he spoke to Kratos. But he cannot imagine that Kratos doesn't know what he would say, at this point. Disappointment and pain and by all rights I should kill you myself sit unspoken on Yuan's tongue.]

[It isn't tenable, but at least, while they are moving, he does not immediately need to see Kratos.]

[simulsimul]

[It isn't tenable. It isn't at all; and the weight of it is almost unbearable. Even for Kratos, with all his stoicism and the knowledge that he had done this, it's unbearable. He is -- not so strong as to be able to manage forever, even if he deserves it. Not especially since he already knows he wasn't strong enough to stad up to O Branain's questioning.

[In the dark of an evening, in Yuan's tent, while they're so precisely ignoring one another, Kratos speaks low and raw to the darkness, where he doesn't know if he wishes Yuan is asleep or not.]

If it would assuage anything, please see fit to take my life.

[It is Yuan's. But surely, anything at all would be better than this -- this waiting.]

[conductingresistance]

[Yuan is on the edge of sleep.]

[Now he is not. This is enough to get Yuan sitting up sharp, for once looking over at Kratos. He's nettled to words, instead of the dull lack of solution that has been the last little while.]

What the hell is wrong with you?

[...it's hard to say if this is better than nothing or not.]

[simulsimul]

[Yuan, it transpires, is not asleep. Kratos exhales a breath, debates whether he -- has the nerve to act in a way other than a slave should.]

You said that should be the punishment.

[His voice, still, is low; and he doesn't quite look over, still laying on the bunk with his fingers laced over his chest, and head faintly turned.]

If that is to be it, then -- Yuan. I cannot stand this waiting.

[Yes, he dares, after all; voice raw and unhappy. He can't stand the weight of this. And now he's dared to use Yuan's name again, as if they aren't master and slave, as if they're -- friends --]

If there is something I can do then I will do it. Even die, if you so please. Only tell me.

[conductingresistance]

I marvel that you think I have the strength for that.

[Yuan's mouth curls distaste, his tone speaks of a bitter self-deprecation. There is no comment on the use of his name. As if it is a nonissue. Yuan himself does not know what it is.]

You ask impossible things of me. It would not please me; but my options have been reduced to lies or murder.

[At least this one puts murder off a while. Yuan's expression is a twisted thing in the dim, and when he speaks again there is a low rasp along the edges of his tone.]

No. It is my fault, trusting where I should not have; you will not die for it today.

[If anyone finds out that may be a different story.]

[simulsimul]

[That -- that stings. Even though it's true; even though Kratos betrayed his trust. But they had never spoken of this; only that Kratos would not be expected to fight. They had not anticipated what should have been so very obvious.]

You brought me here.

[Kratos's voice is thick, almost twisted in turn.]

What else could I have done? I did not mislead you. I never did.

[He had said he could not abandon Tethe'alla. This is why he chose slavery. He could not. Yuan had known this.]

I cannot promise --

[He can't promise he wouldn't do the same again.]

[conductingresistance]

I know.

[Yuan cuts him off at the pass, frustrated and bleak.]

I should have expected this. I did not. It is, as I have said, my fault and my responsibility to handle.

[But all this is clipped cold, and it does not mean things can be as they were between them.]

[Yuan's inability to handle this as he should is also his own responsibility.]

Enough.

[simulsimul]

[Not enough. It is not enough. For the first time Kratos moves, pushing himself up and swinging his bad leg around, and not quite sinking so much as falling, in a controlled fashion, to his knees in front of Yuan. His hands reach out, and if they cannot find hands then they will simply grip clothes.]

It is not your responsibility alone. Didn't you tell me to say when things -- were too much? When I could -- no longer bear it?

I cannot take it back; I cannot say I would do differently. If my only alternative in future is to do nothing or throw myself on swords instead, I know what I would choose, and it would not make you feel any better than you do now. But I made the choice, also. Don't -- if I am not to hold my feelings alone, than neither are you.

[He bends his head more, and his grip tightens, and his voice comes rawer still.]

You are mine also, remember?

[conductingresistance]

[Hands do not grip. But Yuan has clothing, still, and he looks over Kratos and hears his words and there is a peculiar distance about it all, as if Yuan cannot connect the reality of Kratos's emotions to himself, to the here and now of these feelings he himself has.]

[But: his mouth will not open for the caustic am I that lingers on his lips.]

[Finally something else manages.]

It was you who made the choice; but I allowed the situation to happen when I should have known better.

[He says nothing of feelings. He does not know if he can manage to take Kratos's in, let alone his own. He stares blankly down at Kratos's hands and head and he aches for this sincerity which he cannot-- he simply cannot.]

And now my options are to kill you myself, to clean up the mess I have allowed to happen, or to lie for you; and if the lie is caught there is every chance both of us will pay the price.

[But he has not killed Kratos. It should be obvious which he has chosen.]

You have made your choice, and I have made mine, foolish as it is.

[simulsimul]

[It was in the middle of an ambush, Kratos could point out, and almost does; how could Yuan possibly have prevented it. Perhaps it's something they should have discussed; perhaps it is reason Kratos should have stayed in Nidavellir.

[And yet: here they are.]

Then let me shoulder part of that burden, since it's due to my actions it is on you.

[He doesn't know what else he could have done. His head lowers until his forehead rests on Yuan's lap, his words a muffled whisper.]

Please don't let us end like this.

[Now that he's seen what could be, Kratos doesn't know how he could possibly live with them sundered. He would surely find a sword to throw himself on, as fast as possible.]

[conductingresistance]

[Let me shoulder part of that burden only sparks fear in Yuan, since he has just been speaking of death and murder, and all unconsciously furious his hands reach and settle, clutching too tight in Kratos's hair--]

You are not permitted to kill yourself, do you understand me? How dare--

[...wait. He might not even have been suggesting that, per se. And he may be hurting Kratos. Yuan frees his hands and lifts like he's been burned, shaking slightly, but Kratos is still in his lap, and all of a sudden Yuan aches in a different way, hearing the rest of what he has said again and again.]

[Please don't let us end like this. It says to Yuan that Kratos has some investiture in whatever the growing thing between them is; that it yet means something to him, those moments of care and odd closeness.]

[All in a rush Yuan wants to forgive him; and then he does not know how, and quick on the heels of that is a low quiet loathing, that Yuan could so easily put down the losses of two of the people in his charge only so he can have a friend--]

[His shoulders curve and his head bows, and he curls over Kratos as though to protect something, trembling and not quite touching and so, so unsure.]

[simulsimul]

[It does hurt, and sudden enough to wring a small noise from Kratos; but then Yuan releases him and Kratos misses the contact, however accidentally tight.]

I understand.

[His voice is still low and muffled by lap. Yuan has -- made it plain that his death would not help. His anger is of a different kind, a helpless kind, and -- and realisation makes Kratos tremble, and dig his fingers in, nearly as tight as Yuan just had.

[He'd done it again, hadn't he? What had made Yuan so angry lifetimes ago, when Kratos contrived to have Yuan do something without his consent. And now the apology falls out, something Kratos hadn't felt was appropriate, because he had said he would make the same choice again -- how could he have expected Yuan to accept an apology for something he would do again?]

I'm sorry. I've put you in a position with no choices once again.

[He hadn't meant to. He hadn't done it to manipulate Yuan into doing something, even something he felt was good for him. But he'd done it, and that's worth an apology. That isn't something he wants to do.]

[conductingresistance]

Sorry does not mean much when it comes to the dead.

[But this is dull and rote. One of Yuan's hovering hands comes to rest on Kratos's shoulder, all light and tremulous.]

I have choices. It is only that I cannot make those which as a commanding officer I should.

[It is easier to talk to Kratos than it should be. Yuan has a problem and he knows he has it, and he does not want to do much about it even though the correct course of action would be -- anything but this.]

Because of you.

[This is not bitter, nor cutting; it simply is. Yuan lets it sit leaden in the air.]

[simulsimul]

[The words sound like a rejection. All of the words sound like a rejection. But then, much of what Yuan says is a rejection, and his hand is warm where it brushes Kratos's shoulder.]

I know.

[But it is all Kratos has to offer; and it is that sort of thinking which has perpetuated the war. He turns his head to rest it more properly in Yuan's lap, and at same time shift so his shoulder is pressed more firmly against Yuan's hand.]

But the belief that such things are not enough has kept us warring for this long. So: it is not much. But can it be enough?

[For just the two of them, and the potential of friendship, and all the difficulties and doubts therein? Surely even now in their small way they're making history. Who ever heard of a Tethe'allan and a Sylveranti making friends?]

[conductingresistance]

[It's wholly alien, having someone -- nestle into him so whole-heartedly and intentionally. There's a stone in the pit of Yuan's stomach nevertheless. Is he so pathetically starved for any kind of warmth that it's all it takes to make him betray his country and responsibilities?]

[But then, his country never has done much for him; he has had to fight and claw for every concession he has wrung out of it. For all that he loves Nidavellir and doesn't know, perhaps, why.]

I don't know.

[Heavy and quiet. Yuan stares at the back of Kratos's head, still and not really seeing it.]

I cannot fulfill all my duties, like this.

[simulsimul]

Some ought not be fulfilled.

[Yuan's duties include murder, after all; as a slave-owner, how many duties has he ignored? Sometimes duty is a command, a demand, and an unreasonable one. Wasn't it Yuan who said that of Kratos, with regard to the subsistence bloodlines?]

Or does the regard you show to me count as fulfilling a duty, in other's eyes?

[Kratos is aware, on some level, that if someone were to see this there would be tales of the Aurion throwing himself at the half-elf. Which ... well, Kratos did do, to be fair. More softly still:]

Is there a way I can help?

[Or is this something they'll both just have to live with, stuck in the crevasse between how the world is and how it ought to be.]

[conductingresistance]

The regard I have for you has been somewhat beyond duty.

[A low rasp of an admission. Yuan stares unseeing at the auburn in his lap.]

I have a duty to the people I command. I have a -- basic duty to you.

[Which his regard is beyond. And both of these things are not currently compatible.]

I-- don't know. I cannot change you, nor would I.

[...sort of. It would feel wrong, to want to change who Kratos is; but he cannot deny that his life would be so much easier if Kratos were tractable, if he did not now need to worry for the lives of his own people if this happens again.]

Which means if this situation arises again the same -- risk -- does as well.

[And they cannot pretend attacks will not happen.]

[simulsimul]

[Even with this situation being what it is, the admission blooms something warm and fierce in Kratos's chest.]

If there must be -- limitations on where I may go while we're camped, or when we're at risk of attack --

[Before Kratos realises it he's mulling through roads north, considering known camping locations, places where ambushes would be a risk. And then he does realise, and turns his face into Yuan's lap to laugh softly, bitterly. How long had O Branain held him in that tent, unsleeping, uneating? Yuan could get the same knowledge from him just by being disappointed.

[Yuan is not the only one conflicted, it seems. Kratos is beginning to doubt even what his action in future will be. What kind of man chooses unnamed countrymen over friend ...]

[conductingresistance]

It-- may be best.

[Haltingly.]

It will hinder what you can do, but keep you safe in-- more than one way.

[Kratos may not like it. Yuan may do it anyway, so that this does not arise again. So that Yuan does not have to make this choice again, and again. To keep his people safe as well as his -- whatever Kratos is.]

[And still Kratos is burrowing into his lap. Yuan doesn't know what to do with this, save perhaps not breathe too deeply on the off chance that this tenuous peace will be disturbed.]

[simulsimul]

[It may be best, Yuan says. It most likely is. But this, too, doesn't feel like enough, and for a moment words are crowding Kratos's throat. If he can -- prevent the risk -- would it be so traitorous, after all, just to give some advice, not even tactics --

[His tongue betrays the direction of his heart.]

Tomorrow or the day after there will be shallows enough to ford. Ignore it. In another day again there will be a shallow delta splitting the river into a tributary leading northward --

[He closes his mouth so hard there's a snick of teeth, and he swallows. He said nothing about tactics, about what would happen there. Surely it doesn't count as treason. Surely.]

[conductingresistance]

[It takes Yuan more than a few minutes to figure out what Kratos is doing. And when he does his breath rushes in all at once, a sharp gasp of a thing.]

Kratos--

[It is useful information. He wants to know: what of that tributary? And yet--]

I thought I said I would not demand this of you.

[It feels a violation, and he's not sure on whose part. His grip on Kratos's shoulder tightens until he realizes what he's doing, and in the moments after he lets go.]

[What does it mean? Why is Kratos doing this?]

Why are you--

[simulsimul]

You did. And you didn't. Demand it, I mean.

[Kratos's voice is thick, and he doesn't buckle under that grip -- or lift his head. The burrow is somewhere between shame and denial of it.]

But it would -- help -- if we could avoid situations where I would have to make that choice again, would it not?

[He had said nothing about tactics.]

[conductingresistance]

[Yuan bows over him again, nearly bent in two, and his forehead brushes Kratos's hair. Very softly:]

Yes. It would help.

[He already knows he cannot take the appropriate recompense from Kratos. But for Kratos to offer this all unsolicited?]

[Yuan-- begins to wonder if Kratos is not just as compromised as he. It is a foolish idea, in truth, thinking so; but he can't quite put it down.]

I-- whatever you offer, I will use for the safety of this force, including you; but I will not ask.

[He had promised.]

[simulsimul]

[Kratos swallows again, and his eyes burn; and if Yuan doesn't mention that his clothes are getting damp, neither will Kratos. Yuan's acceptance is -- It hurts, at the same time it doesn't; it isn't Yuan which makes him hurt so much as the immediate desire to cast away all the shards of patriotism Yuan had marvelled at.

[Those shards scrape.]

Then don't stop at the first shallows.

[It is a prime ambush site, and usually involves mages unleashing a flood. Kratos -- really should not be surprised, that reinforcements are needed. Those floods can wipe out whole companies, if timed right. And Bia will know exactly why they bypassed it, when those people Kratos saved return.

[He doesn't know whether Yuan knows the risk. Surely reports of other forces being caught have been sent back. ... Or attempted to be sent back. Kratos doesn't know. These mountains inhabit the narrowest part of Tethe'alla, pinched so tightly between seas that they're hazardous to cross even for those familiar; and perfect for guerrilla warfare. It's possible that no detailed reports have made it back.]

[conductingresistance]

...I understand.

[And this of all things clears some of the stone and ash settled inside Yuan. By telling him this Kratos is saving lives. As many, or more than, he took.]

[It makes little difference to those two soldiers. And yet: to those who live it may make all the difference in the world.]

[Yuan's head rests fully against Kratos's and in this moment he does not care.]

Thank you.

[He doesn't ask why. Perhaps it is foolishness, to trust. And yet: here he is.]